//If you didn't want to wait, you shouldn't have come early..//
But he knew that if he'd arrived any later than he did, he would have worried.. worried that his partner had been here first, and perhaps waited for him then left.. no, it was much easier to come fifteen minutes prior to eight and spend the time distracting himself, pretending he was as confident as he wished, confident enough to worry about what would happen once Kozi got here like a normal person would do, not if he would come at all. Despite it, his pale fingertips drummed against the tabletop, graced with only a tablecloth and napkins as the food could not be ordered until Kozi-kun arrived, and begun telling the story over in his head again, trying to distract himself by thinking if he'd finished everything at home before coming out, but always being drawn back to Kozi somehow..
He glanced down at the fraying edges of the shirt beneath his suit, small orange fibres clinging to the black material against his wrist. The crisp black suit was practically the only clean unwrinkled item left in his closet this morning when he went to change, he regretted it as his children's intuition has directed him towards a faint orange shirt with small black buttons, which was now beginning to malt on his one respectable black item. Although it could barely be seen unless closely inspected, he was sure Kozi would notice-- Kozi always noticed things like that. Little imperfections, in his music, in his clothing, in his performances. He was always striving for perfection, trying to get things absolutely faultless. He was a lover of beauty.
He sighed. There was little sense in what he knew of Kozi and what he knew of himself. But he let it pass as a waiter moved past the table again, suspiciously eyeing where he sat, checking yet again, no doubt, if his friend was here yet, or ever going to arrive.
//They just think he's late because I got here early.. but he's not, he still has another five minutes before eight o'clock.. he'll be here..//
His fingertips began drumming on the table again, making a noise progressively louder and louder, unheard to his ears, but seen by his eyes within a few moments in the reactions of the visitors nearby, who had leant over their meals to bring themselves closer to their guests and hosts, whispering about the disruptance. Embarassed he pulled his hands back under the table and rested them on his lap, realising that his right leg was jolting up and down with nerves. Forcing it to come to a standstill with a combination of mindpower and his hands, he glanced out the window and onto the city lights below.
The small dots of light stood out amongst the near pitch black of the city, the buildings illuminated by the pinprick holes of white joining together and forming a dim glow. He thought it was pretty to see the city like this at night.. Kozi would appreciate it if he got here...
//When he gets here.. when.. stop being so pessimistic..//
But although he scolded himself for constantly thinking the worst, the thoughts did not cease once his eyes drifted back to the city, blanketed in shadow before him. He lifted his index finger to the place between his eyes and pushed his glasses up further onto the bridge of his nose, sighing again and looking down at the tablecloth. His hand fell down to rest upon it and the small metallic watch poking out from underneith the tangle of orange and black shone in the light trickling through the window. Its face glinted for a moment and caught his eye. It had just gone eight o'clock.
He heard the elevator open behind him, a small "bing~" ringing through the quieting restaurant. But before his hopes could spark, he heard a man addressing the elevator occupant, and to his dismay, the voice replied. A voice that wasn't Kozi's. He sighed and looked back down at his hands, clasping each other, not even bothering to turn around..-